Double Standards between men and women

 

There are a lot of double standards when it comes to between men and women. I’ll make an illustration with some made up characters to demonstrate.

 

Child sex abuse

 

Dick is a male teacher. He has had a sexual relation with a 16-year-old girl Amy. By right, he is punished severely for statutory rape. Despite the fact that the said 16-year-old girl liked Dick because he’s a mature adult. (I’m not saying that it was ok in any way just because she liked him) That being said, no one would say, “She got lucky, where was he when I was 16, she must have wanted it,” anything to defend pedophilia.

 

Jane is a female teacher. She has had a sexual relation with a 16-year-old Andy. She was not punished, and the media calls it “sexual affair” instead of what it is; Rape. And the boy was told he was “lucky.” Andy did not like Jane and did not feel comfortable with what happened. But society will always defend her and glamorize her rather than call her for what she is; a rapist and a pedophile.

 

Couple of women giggles as they see a young boy in his bathing suit and decided to pull it down as they film it. He was horrified, confused, uncomfortable and afraid. They do not get punished for it, even when they post it online and get thousands of likes for it. Apparently it’s ok to sexually assault little boys.

 

Couple of men giggle as they see a young girl in her bathing suit and pulled it down as they film it. They were arrested and charged.

 

Being around kids

 

John is sitting on a bench at a park, just watching the clouds. There were children nearby playing, which he paid no mind. His nephew was playing with the kids. A woman comes up to him, “Why are you sitting here watching these children, you pervert? You better go away or I’m calling the police.”

“I’m here with my nephew miss, and I would appreciate it if you didn’t insinuate that I’m some pedophile. Leave me alone. I’m not doing anything.”

“I’m calling the police!”

 

Jane is sitting on the bench and children are playing in the park. She get’s little Andy’s attention, “My, aren’t you such a cute boy. Come over here, I got some treat for you.” She then touches Andy inappropriately. No one pays her any mind and Andy feels very uncomfortable.

 

Abusive partner

 

Dick is yelling at his girlfriend in public, screaming at her and calling her a whore and a bitch. His girlfriend being so afraid and trapped, she didn’t know what she could do. Several men came to her rescue to stop him.

 

Jane was yelling at her boyfriend, calling him names and putting him down. She proceeds to hit him and kick him. The boyfriend was uncertain what to do and was hurt and felt trapped. No one came to his defense, but instead the onlookers cheer her on and calls him names too. Saying things, “He must have done something to deserve this!”

 

Rape

 

Susan was raped and she had been to the police. The rapist was arrested and put in prison. (granted there are rapists who didn’t go to prison for raping a woman) she has support and she was heard by many people.

 

John was raped and he had been to the police. The police laughed at him, “You can’t get raped, you’re a man.” There are no support system for him and no one would listen or believe him.

 

False accusation

 

 

Jane accused Andy of raping her. He was sent to prison for 5 years before she was caught lying about being raped. She was however not punished for false accusation and Andy’s life is ruined by the lie.

 

jokes

 

Jane had decided to throw in a hashtag #killallmen, which then her defense was that she was “just joking.” “Oh my god, it was just a joke. You’re all so sensitive!”

 

Dick made a joke about rape, which a lot of people were in an uproar and demanded that he apologized.

 

Entertainment

 

A movie depicted John being sexually assaulted by a woman in this comedy movie, which people thought this was funny and somehow ok. They would defend this by saying, “Men always horny for sex,” or that “men can’t be sexually assaulted or raped.”

 

A movie depicted a woman being disrobed and is fully nude on screen, which people cried out about male gaze, sexualizing women and oppression of women.

 

The “Gender pay gap”

 

John worked in his job full time, rarely took sick days and is always on time and working. He got an increase in wage for his dedication in his work. This would be called “the patriarchy” or “male privilege.”

 

Jane took on a job for 35 hours, took more time off and was not showing up for work on time, but complains about being paid less than her male counterpart, proclaiming that there’s a gender pay gap.

 

John works in a dangerous job which is a high risk of injury or death.

 

Jane works in a nursing station and complains about being too cold.

 

Killing their children

 

Dick murdered his wife and their two kids: Amy and Andy. He was put in death row, and no one feels sorry for him or try to wonder what caused him to murder his family. Even if he was mentally ill, or suffered abuse or anything, no one cared and wished him dead.

 

Jane murdered her children, Amy and Andy. People’s first inclination was that the father killed the kids. But if it came to light that he didn’t but grieved when found out about his children, they ignored him. Jane was arrested, but people tried to look for excuses for her, “Maybe she’s mentally ill, maybe she was abused by her husband, maybe she was molested as a child.” Anything to defend her heinous act.

 

Child molestation in the family

 

Dick molested his stepdaughter who is only 12 years old. He got arrested and was sent to prison.

 

Jane molested her daughter/son who are 12 years old. No charges are brought against her and no one believes that a mother would ever hurt her children.

 

Amy was molested by her older brother. No one believes her, even when she went to the police.

 

Andy was molested by his uncle, but no one believed him.

 

Domestic violence

 

Jane was verbally yelling at John, calling him names, belittling him and throwing things at him. He had called the police, but was the one arrested. The police had told him that he must have done something to deserve this. There was no domestic violence shelter for him and no support for him because “men can’t be abused.”

 

Susan was being verbally abused and physically abused by Dick. She suffered bruises and cuts. She called the police and he was arrested. There are hundreds of domestic violence shelters for her and support everywhere for her.

 

Divorce cases

 

Jane divorced John and had him pay child support and alimony to her. She used the money for herself instead of supporting their two kids they have together. John gets very limited visitation with his kids and the kids were told lies by their mother about him being a bad father. Anything John did was counted against him and he lost right to see his kids, causing him to commit suicide.

 

Susan divorced Dick because of the abuse she went through. She was rewarded child support and alimony, but Dick was adamant about giving her money to support herself and the two kids he didn’t care for.

 

 

Body shaming

 

 

Susan was upset that people were making fun of her for her small breasts, stretch marks and that she looked plain. It was very uncomfortable and rude to say to her, many people also stood by her and supported her.

 

John was shamed for his body, the fact that he has less than 6 inch penis, a paunchy belly and has acne problem. It seem to be appropriate to make fun of him. All the time we see in movies where a man’s penis was mocked for being too small or considered unattractive if he’s doesn’t have 6 pack abs or unblemished skin.

 

Television shows

 

 

Jane is depicted as a strong and empowered woman who talks down to men, flaunts her intelligence and sassy attitude, act holier than thou. She is considered brave and empowering.

 

John was depicted as an idiot dad who has no clue how to be a father and is always getting everything wrong (The simpsons, Family Guy, Everybody loves Raymond, Home improvement, king of queens, etc.). Or he is depicted as a villain who is always abusive or a rapist.

 

Jane runs a talk show and she openly talks about men in negative and hateful ways, mocking male victims and encouraging women to treat their husbands like dirt.

 

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Jane is depicted as a know it all woman who can do everything just right, with a click of a button on her phone to solve all problems and the world shines bright and shiny.

 

John is depicted as an idiot or toxic male who is just making everything worse and is shamed for it (Gillette ad).

 

Bringing a date to your parents

 

Andy was going to his girlfriend’s parents house. The father sits down with him and unleashes threats and fear, “You’re going to bring her back home on time or there’s going to be consequences. If she comes home crying, I will hunt you down. If I see a mark on her, I will kill you, you hear me?!”

Apparently this is an acceptable behavior for any parent and even somehow funny. Never mind that that will just chase away any dating potential for her and leaves her to wonder why no one would date her. It’s not the parent that is toxic, it’s the boy who refuses to be bullied and intimidated by the parent that is somehow toxic.

 

Amy was going to her boyfriend’s house. The mother sits down with her and unleashes hell on her, “That is my baby boy, I will not allow you to treat him like a punching bag, or an atm machine and you will not mock him or belittle him or treat him bad. If he comes home crying or has a mark on him, I will hunt you to the ends of the earth and kill you myself. Have a nice date.”